Some DON’Ts and DOs when comforting others

• Don’t yawn or fall asleep, even in a midnight conversation. A griever is fragile.
• Don’t interrupt them to tell about something good in your life. A griever is vulnerable.
• Don’t say that others have had it worse. A griever can easily be silenced.
• Don’t think that comfort is only hugs – it could mean taking them for a walk. A griever needs variety.
• Don’t promise that everything will turn out alright. A griever deserves honesty.

Some DOs…

• Do respect their emotional boundaries. Grief can only be carried by the griever.
• Do remember that as your life goes on, they will grieve in silence. Grief is ever-present.
• Do keep it confidential, because it is their story to share, not yours. Grief is private.
• Do promise that you will support them as best you can. Grief is overwhelming.

Yet, there is an even greater Comforter, the one who actually makes us better – God. ‘He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds’ (Psalm 147:3).

(photo by Karolina Grabowska: https://www.pexels.com)