Category: grief

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Going back…

Just recently I went back to visit a place where I experienced great pain. I didn’t know what to expect, but I certainly didn’t think I would come away amazed. For, I learned that a place has nothing to do with pain – it is the person who caused that pain.

It was such a simple and obvious realization, yet it helped me narrow down my grief. For, grief has a way of taking over life, of putting a dark filter over our eyes, but grief is much more specific than a general sad fog. And I learned this because the place where I had been hurt was now beautiful and loved. It was cared for. A place where people lived in peace.

I am deeply thankful to God for this experience and wanted to share it with you. Maybe you too have found the same…

Photo by Lisa Luminaire on Unsplash

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Where our power lies…

I used to think that power comes from self-confidence, of knowing my mind and fulfilling my dreams. But if I fall into the hands of a manipulative person, they can change my reality. And sometimes it takes years to come to my senses. Then grief overwhelms – How could I have been so deceived? Anger – This was wrong! Shame – Why didn’t I see it before? Guilt – I let my life get ruined.

But I forget where my true power lies – not in capability, cleverness, or even my goodness. It comes from God, who says, “At that time I will deal with all who oppressed you. I will rescue the lame; I will gather the exiles. I will give them praise and honour in every land where they have suffered shame” (Zephaniah 1:19)

God puts us back on the road so we can relearn to walk. He enables us to lift up our heads without shame and live.

Photo by Giulia Bertelli on Unsplash

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Can others wreck our lives?

May I share with you what I have learned…

God always speaks out against the injustices we suffer. He always upholds us when we are wronged. He walks with us through our hard times. He never lets us down.

I have also learned that even though everyone has a choice, we can’t make anyone choose to do what is right. And, even though their choices may ruin our lives, God always has another way. He redirects our eyes to something new.

Because we understand grief, we can comfort those who grieve. Because we suffer injustice, we can fight for those who are crushed. God doesn’t consider our past as wasted years; it is the foundation on which he builds hope.

Photo by Dawid Zawiła on Unsplash

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What is conflict?

Conflict is sparks flying. It is emotions rising. It is experiencing what most of us think we would rather avoid. Yet, sometimes conflict is necessary. When we speak up for the slandered. When we defend the defenseless. When we risk our reputation to protect the innocent.

But our actions can only resolve part of the problem. The slandered might still feel worthless. The defenseless might still feel powerless. And, the innocent might still feel betrayed. These are reactions that continue to harm.

Conflict then shows us another face. It fights for the hearts that sink into despair. It fights against the lies that drag them there. Yes, conflict is sometimes called love.

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Are we safe?

There are times when the waves of life roll in, crashing on our shores. A couple of weeks ago I almost lost someone very dear to me. Now someone else is slipping away. I keep thinking, “It’s going to be hard to survive this loss.”

Then, out of the blue a text came in the night. Someone passed on a message to me. “Eva, I am for you!” From God.

I would like to share this same message with you. Have you been up most of the night? Are you experiencing some kind of grief? Could it be a decision you have to make? Or, maybe you don’t feel strong enough to stand up against a wrong? Whatever it is, God is for you. Let him be with you. You are safe.

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It takes two!

A few days ago I experienced something painful in my heart. I prayed that God would send me someone to help me regain perspective. I set off on a walk. Maybe I would meet this person, and maybe they would stop me. But, I wouldn’t take the initiative, I would let God do it.

I had barely started out when a virtual stranger stopped me. She asked me how I was.

I was taken aback, and didn’t want to share. But I had prayed, and God had done his part. I had better do mine. I told her what was going on. “I’ve been there too,” she said. “It isn’t your fault…”

God does answer our prayers! But, we too have to do our part.

 

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Can a life get ruined?

A few days ago someone assured me that I could still fulfill a dream I had as a youth. I had wanted to become a medical doctor, but no matter how hard I tried, the door slammed shut again and again. This ‘someone’ encouraged me to go back to school.

I declined. My doctor dream may have been totally crushed, but God replaced it with something else. You see, our talents can be expressed in many different ways. I had wanted to help people’s bodies to heal, but God wanted me to help people’s hearts

What about you? Has your life turned out different than you had hoped? Do you feel like it has been ruined? Don’t give up hope. Seek God’s perspective. Let him redirect you and you will find life. 

 

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Pushed away

You probably know how hard it is when those we love push us away…

  • If you don’t do what I say, you can’t be my friend.
  • If you love me, you will never disagree with me.
  • If you care for me, you won’t tell the truth.

What are we supposed to do? We are upset and scared.Stacheldraht

But God doesn’t push us away. He says, “I, even I, am he who comforts you. Who are you that you fear mortal men? … I have put my words in your mouth and covered you with the shadow of my hand.” (Isaiah 51:12,16)

God gives us his dignity. He gives us the wisdom how to respond. He protects us. We can move on.

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Valley of Tears

Sometimes life seems to throw us more than we can cope with. Sometimes these troubles come at once… the washing machine breaking, the fridge, the car, the printer, the telephone, my boots… emotional griefs… death, rejection, and exhaustion… My tears flowed unhindered. I was truly in a deep, dark valley.

Then I got a paper cut and spilled lemon juice on it. I started to laugh. The solution was so simple, I rinsed my finger in water. When life stings, I immerse myself in God, his Word. I drink his peace and perspective. “As we pass through the Valley of Weeping, we make it a place of springs.” (Psalm 84:6)

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The Comforter

When any one makes a 2007-11-03 18-06-17_0078promise, it is like signing a treaty. Friends promise to look out for their friends.  Couples promise to forsake all others. Others promise to fulfill their commitments. But what happens if those treaties are broken?

We hurt. We cry out at the injustice. We feel so alone. But there is a God of compassion, who comforts us in all our troubles. (2 Corinthians 1:4) Let’s fall into HIS arms for comfort. He always keeps his promises.