Category: shame

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‘It wasn’t your fault.’

Sometimes people tell us, ‘It wasn’t your fault,’ especially when we struggle with our past. But we might push them away, for they obviously don’t know what went on.

But often those on the outside can see our lives better. They hear our stories and the guilt we have assumed. They see how we were made to feel responsible. We feel guilty for things we never did.

It takes a journey to move from shame to freedom. It takes accepting the invitation our friends have extended. For they long to see us living OUR lives and leaving behind the lies.

‘It wasn’t your fault,’ are releasing words. We can move on.

(photo by Pixabay – www.pexels.com)

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Where our power lies…

I used to think that power comes from self-confidence, of knowing my mind and fulfilling my dreams. But if I fall into the hands of a manipulative person, they can change my reality. And sometimes it takes years to come to my senses. Then grief overwhelms – How could I have been so deceived? Anger – This was wrong! Shame – Why didn’t I see it before? Guilt – I let my life get ruined.

But I forget where my true power lies – not in capability, cleverness, or even my goodness. It comes from God, who says, “At that time I will deal with all who oppressed you. I will rescue the lame; I will gather the exiles. I will give them praise and honour in every land where they have suffered shame” (Zephaniah 1:19)

God puts us back on the road so we can relearn to walk. He enables us to lift up our heads without shame and live.

Photo by Giulia Bertelli on Unsplash

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That “NEVER” Word

Never? Yes! “The one who trusts will never be dismayed.” (Isaiah 28:16) God is quoted again in the Bible, but it is slightly altered. “The one who trusts in the Lord will never be put to shame.” (1 Peter 2:6)  Shame shows our sense of moral inadequacy, of feeling that we have royally failed. Dismay shows our sense of DSC_0192 emotional inadequacy, of feeling overwhelmed by things happening outside our control. We might have messed up, or life might have messed us up, yet when we trust in God, when we know that He is in control, not us… His indisputable NEVER takes hold.

In the midst of being forced to work for my father I felted utterly dismayed. I couldn’t change it. I  also felt shame at not having the strength to fight him. God never judged me for my seeming failures. NEVER. He held my hand and led me out.