Category: broken relationships

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Bible psychology – The opportunity in our personality

Each of us has a personality – it influences the way we think, feel and behave. And, even before we were born, it was right there as a part of us. But we might think life unfair, especially if we end up with some unwanted traits.

But the Bible says, ‘Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it’ (Psalm 139:14 NLT). Now, imagine God stirring up our gene pool, picking out exactly who we should be. He gives us the good and the challenging – each one an opportunity to see how we will do.

I know of someone who had a raging temper. They actually couldn’t remember what they did or said. But this person recognised that this was dangerous and began to work on themselves. They learned how to channel it into something good…

(photo by David Guerrero: www.pexels.com)

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The charm of being human…

There is a certain risk when dressing in the dark. We could put our clothes on wrong. Yesterday I did it again. I wore my shirt inside out, and I didn’t even notice until I took it off in the evening. And no one told me that they could see my tags, or the seams and darts in my shirt. They carried on.

It didn’t change what I did or said or went, because I didn’t know. And by the end of the day, it was too late to be embarrassed. It had happened.

What did I learn from it? All of us carry imperfections in our lives, a broken past or personal mishaps, which we don’t even know about. So, just carry on, and at the right time it will come to light.

(photo by Sergey Makashin: ww.pexels.com)

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‘Call me, Bitter.’

That was what Naomi said when she lost her husband and two sons. She said, ‘Don’t call me Naomi. Call me Mara, because the Almighty has made my life very bitter’ (Ruth 1:20). And in her deep grief, she tried to drive away those she loved.

God’s exiled people experienced the same in nature. They came to a spring, but ‘they could not drink its water because it was bitter’ (Exodus 15:23). They backed away from it and rejected it, because bitterness has a way of driving others away.

But God stepped into both situations. God gave Naomi a grandson through the very person she tried to reject. He cured the water for his exiled people, the very water they refused to drink. And God will do the same for us. Let’s not drive others away in our great sadness and bitterness of heart, for it is often through these people that we find God’s hope.

image: pexels-yaroslav-shuraev-8968077.jpg

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Can others wreck our lives?

May I share with you what I have learned…

God always speaks out against the injustices we suffer. He always upholds us when we are wronged. He walks with us through our hard times. He never lets us down.

I have also learned that even though everyone has a choice, we can’t make anyone choose to do what is right. And, even though their choices may ruin our lives, God always has another way. He redirects our eyes to something new.

Because we understand grief, we can comfort those who grieve. Because we suffer injustice, we can fight for those who are crushed. God doesn’t consider our past as wasted years; it is the foundation on which he builds hope.

Photo by Dawid Zawiła on Unsplash

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Which way am I going?

I too have been looking back, aching over a broken relationship. But I hurt so much, I lost my sense of direction. I lived in the past and forgot about now.

 Then I came upon a verse, “Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing!” (Isaiah 43:18-19) Forget? How could I?

But forget also means to deliberately stop thinking about something, and not to bring it to mind. Because sometimes we slip into a relentless time-warp, where we relive our grief again and again.

And when I could choose to turn my head from the past, I began to see what God is doing, giving me something new. A strength of heart to live with love and joy.