Ruined…

Recently, bulldozers moved in, levelling a wood and meadow. The carnage was brutal, with splintered branches and uprooted trees. And when those bulldozers moved out, they left behind a permanent change.

So, why did I think it could be any different with relationships? For some reason, I thought that when a destructive person moved away, everything would snap back to normal. I thought that people could simply bounce back into being happy and whole, that things would be okay.

Now I know it takes a long time to rebuild. I know the scenery has permanently changed. But, there is hope. With God, I am working at pushing broken logs to one side. Maybe kindness and love will take root.

(photo by Boris Hamer: pexels.com)

Our best is enough…

Over the last few months I have joined in initiating three new projects. Each one totally different. A community centre. A writers’ group. An apple orchard. And with each I feel out of my depth.

Yet over the years I have learned that it is okay to feel that way. It is okay to look at a blank sheet of paper and go blank. It is okay to feel lost.

But, I have found that the ideas do come. A random chat on the street. A person who has been there before and shares their expertise. The encouragement of a friend.

And when I give my best and ‘work at it with all [my] heart, as working for the Lord,’* something always happens. The initiatives take on a life. They bless.

*Colossians 3:23 (photo by Tim Douglas: www.pexels.com)

The charm of being human…

There is a certain risk when dressing in the dark. We could put our clothes on wrong. Yesterday I did it again. I wore my shirt inside out, and I didn’t even notice until I took it off in the evening. And no one told me that they could see my tags, or the seams and darts in my shirt. They carried on.

It didn’t change what I did or said or went, because I didn’t know. And by the end of the day, it was too late to be embarrassed. It had happened.

What did I learn from it? All of us carry imperfections in our lives, a broken past or personal mishaps, which we don’t even know about. So, just carry on, and at the right time it will come to light.

(photo by Sergey Makashin: ww.pexels.com)

‘Call me, Bitter.’

That was what Naomi said when she lost her husband and two sons. She said, ‘Don’t call me Naomi. Call me Mara, because the Almighty has made my life very bitter’ (Ruth 1:20). And in her deep grief, she tried to drive away those she loved.

God’s exiled people experienced the same in nature. They came to a spring, but ‘they could not drink its water because it was bitter’ (Exodus 15:23). They backed away from it and rejected it, because bitterness has a way of driving others away.

But God stepped into both situations. God gave Naomi a grandson through the very person she tried to reject. He cured the water for his exiled people, the very water they refused to drink. And God will do the same for us. Let’s not drive others away in our great sadness and bitterness of heart, for it is often through these people that we find God’s hope.

image: pexels-yaroslav-shuraev-8968077.jpg

That other option…

Many times, my personal troubles refused to go away. No matter how creatively I tried to reduce their effects, they persisted. No matter how I tried to relegate them to emotionally ‘unimportant’, they kept resurfacing. So, I thought that maybe I should give up and accept them as my inevitable lot in life.

There was another option, however. Expose them. Tell God about them. But I didn’t want to. Maybe God would think less of me. Maybe he would reject me. But then it occurred to me – he already knew, because he knows everything about me. And he still loved me!

It was probably the most liberating moment in my relationship with him. I didn’t have to hide. I didn’t have to pretend. I could tell him all my troubles in detail, and God was interested – deeply.

Photo by Pixabay