Retrospect…

My wedding day was certainly tough. Someone stepped in and caused trouble on all sides. Then, at the reception, my granny gave me an unwrapped, tattered, black leather Bible. I had thought wedding gifts should be new!

I thanked her and flicked it open just for a second. Yellowed pages. Marked and underlined verses. I can’t tell you how sad I felt. So, I left that Bible untouched, unread. Ten years later, I sent it to a relative.

Fifteen years passed and I travelled the several thousand miles to visit this relative. They told me that during my wedding reception, my granny had stepped aside and sat quietly in a corner with that Bible on her lap. Her head was bent down as she underlined verses. ‘I didn’t know that!’ I said, surprised.

‘You should read it,’ this relative said. ‘Those verses are for you.’ Then they hurried to fetch the Bible and gave it back to me.

Out of curiosity, I opened it and searched. A whole series of passages had been marked, but it surprised me because these were my favourites as well. All these years later, I discovered that God had taken her down a similar path. Both of us had concluded that God is good, even in the midst of intense sadness. Both of us loved him.

I kept on flicking, page after page and God spoke deep into my heart. Here is one of those passages:

‘As they pass through the Valley of Baka (or Weeping), they make it a place of springs… For the Lord God is a sun and a shield; the Lord bestows favour and honour; no good thing does he withhold from those whose way is blameless’ (Psalm 84:6, 11).

Our troubles don’t define us, God does.

The challenge of wanting to be right…

Recently, Derek and I spoke with a newly married couple and they asked us to share some advice, especially as Derek and I have been married a long time. We paused. There was so much we could say, ‘Love each other,’ ‘Be kind’, or even ‘With God you can do it.’

But what came mind was something we have learned the hard way. It is something Jesus repeated taught as well – ‘Listen, then, if you have ears!’* There is little mileage in winning an argument, but a conversation can go a long way.

As a very wise lady once observed about another conflict a long time ago: ‘Why do they argue? Don’t they see that both are right?’

So our advice to this couple was simple – ‘Listen.’

(Mark 4:23 – Good News Translation)

(photo by Vera Arsic: pexels.com)

Going back…

Just recently I went back to visit a place where I experienced great pain. I didn’t know what to expect, but I certainly didn’t think I would come away amazed. For, I learned that a place has nothing to do with pain – it is the person who caused that pain.

It was such a simple and obvious realization, yet it helped me narrow down my grief. For, grief has a way of taking over life, of putting a dark filter over our eyes, but grief is much more specific than a general sad fog. And I learned this because the place where I had been hurt was now beautiful and loved. It was cared for. A place where people lived in peace.

I am deeply thankful to God for this experience and wanted to share it with you. Maybe you too have found the same…

Photo by Lisa Luminaire on Unsplash

You will get through.

God sees. He knows. He understands. But he doesn’t just stand there on the sidelines cheering you on. He holds you. He breathes in strength. He says, “I am right here beside you.”

Take heart and never give up.