Those unexpected memories…

We may have done everything properly as we grieved:

  • Gone through the five stages of denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance*.
  • Committed our broken hearts to God and asked him to heal us.
  • Trusted him for our future, that he would help us through.

We moved on… but then something happened to remind us. A conversation. A situation. An emotion. And we grieved yet again.

I have learned to lay each flashback at Jesus’ feet, to sit with him in the night for as long as I need. I have learned to accept his precious promises as my own. “The Lord, the King of Israel, is with you; never again will you fear any harm” (Zephaniah 3:15). We don’t have to be afraid. Jesus is with us. We can get up and live.

*1969, psychiatrist, Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

Photo by Jon Asato on Unsplash

Unexpected freedom at twenty-one…

Something spooked my father and we fled until he felt safe – a thousand miles. We finally set up tents on an Arizona mountain, beside a road built by prisoners of war. For three weeks we camped in that desolate wilderness. 

In the silence, I played my accordion. My melody echoed with the remembered chisel sounds of those prisoners. I too was a captive to someone else’s fear. Yet my fingers played something far more captivating… 

“Oh the deep, deep love of Jesus
Vast, unmeasured, boundless, free
Rolling as a mighty ocean
In its fullness over me, underneath me, all around me
Is the current of your love
Leading onward, leading homeward
To your glorious rest above.”

Jesus holds us tight in a love that understands.

Composer: Samuel Trevor Francis (1834-1925).  Photo: OB OA on Unsplash.