The challenge of wanting to be right…

Recently, Derek and I spoke with a newly married couple and they asked us to share some advice, especially as Derek and I have been married a long time. We paused. There was so much we could say, ‘Love each other,’ ‘Be kind’, or even ‘With God you can do it.’

But what came mind was something we have learned the hard way. It is something Jesus repeated taught as well – ‘Listen, then, if you have ears!’* There is little mileage in winning an argument, but a conversation can go a long way.

As a very wise lady once observed about another conflict a long time ago: ‘Why do they argue? Don’t they see that both are right?’

So our advice to this couple was simple – ‘Listen.’

(Mark 4:23 – Good News Translation)

(photo by Vera Arsic: pexels.com)

Emotional traps

Have you ever been so upset, you dared not speak? I recently was, even though I did all the right things. Count to ten. Take deep breaths. Try to see things from another perspective.

Nothing helped, and all I accomplished was losing sleep and gaining five pounds  in weight. I cried out to God, “Help me.”

A simple thought came to mind… “Focus on God.”

I shifted my gaze from the pain within, to a verse on the kitchen window sill. “The Lord is gracious, and full of compassion; slow to anger, and rich in love.” (Psalm 145:8) I caught my breath. I had been feeling the opposite. It was time to realign with God.

Do you have verses around the house to help you regain perspective?

 

Out of sync

I have this persistent longing to make a mark in life. I have this one-track mind that says it must look a certain way. Somehow it has sunk deep into my heart that adulthood is where it happens. Why? I grew up with that old Victorian creed, “Children should be seen and not heard.” I believed that life did not begin until one grew up.

But God is challenging me yet again, to go to those silenced ones, any silenced ones, whether children or adult, and listen. To value them and help them find their voice.

God is saying, “Hear and pay attention. Do not be arrogant, for the Lord has spoken.” (Jeremiah 13:15) This is a challenge for me… to step away from making a mark… to step into sync with God…. to enable the silenced to speak.

Decisions! Decisions!

All of us encounter crossroads in our lives. The signposts point in different directions, and our emotions can get in the way…

We’re scared: maybe we should go back the way we came, back to our familiar rut. We want perfection: maybe, if we camped out by the signpost, a better option will arise. We tired of waiting: how about tossing a coin, and hopefully someone will stop us if we’re charging towards oblivion!

There is a four word solution. God says, “Stand at the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is, and walk in it.” (Jeremiah 6:16) It is… Stand. Look. Ask. Walk.

At this moment I am asking about the books I have written. Which publishing path should I take? Then comes the hard part, WALK!

 

Eva Leaf

To wear it, or not

Derek bought me a hat, a green one with a bow in the back. We both like it, but others have not been so positive. “You look eccentric!” “You really look funny!” And the best one.. “Your hat looks like a lily pad!”

I appreciate the honesty. But… there is a wonderful verse in the Bible. It says that God “has made everything beautiful in its time.”* We don’t need to worry about opinions. God created beauty to stand out as different, for that is what beauty is. Each of us is beautiful, regardless of our peculiarities.

I still wear my hat, and when people meet me, they nod and smile. They even stop for a chat. My lily-pad hat might be eccentric, but so is God’s love.

* (Ecclesiastes  3:11)

 

Ever feel lost?

The other night my mobile phone’s GPS told me that my thirty-minute journey would take two hours! Another accident, I thought. I followed the directions. Then it said, “Turn left on Bicycle Route 6.” What? It thought I was a bike!

I reset my phone, and it took me down a single-track road. Four kilometers later, no lights or habitations around, tall metal bollards blocked my way. Only bicycles could pass through. I came unglued. “I’m a car,” I cried out, “not a bike!”

Then it hit me. I wasn’t a car. I wasn’t even an insignificant dot to a satellite in the sky. I was scared, and God’s precious daughter. I could trust HIM… I turned off my mobile phone and prayed. God got me home with his GPS.

Blackout

Have you ever been caught in a darkness so deep, you couldn’t see your hands in front of your face, even when you held them right up to your nose? Maybe you decided to sit still and wait things out.

But, imagine, your child starts crying. Deep darkness or not, you feel your way forward, crashing into furniture, calling out comforting words. It takes a desperation to actually walk, without sight, without light. The Bible says, “Let him who walks in the dark and has no light, trust in the name of the Lord and rely on his God.” (Isaiah 50:10)

Are you walking in darkness? I am. Let’s follow the unseen God within our hearts.

Did I get it wrong?

If you asked me if I recognized God’s voice, I would have said, “Yes!” But yesterday a friend came to mind. I felt I should visit her. I texted and rang, but no reply. In the end I drove to her house, a 72 mile round trip.

I knocked on her door. No one answered. I thought I had heard God right. In the end I wrote a note and posted it through my friend’s letter box. Romans 8:28. “And we know that God works all things together for good to them who love him.” 

I laughed. Maybe this trip was actually for me. God wanted to remind me that everything does work for good, even when things go wrong.

The voice above the umbrella

A group of us scattered inside a maze, the kind where the hedges are two meters high. A friend and I got lost. Then I heard my husband’s voice. “Derek, did you make it?” I called.

“Yes!” came the reply. “Where are you?”

I happened to be carrying a long umbrella. “Here!” I called, and raised it high.

Derek laughed. “I can see everything. I’ll guide you.” He gave instructions, watching the tip of my umbrella as it bobbed along. “Left. Right. Not that right! The next one…”

Life is like that. We get so lost and mixed up. Then we hear God’s voice. “I see everything!” he says. “Listen. I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go.” (from Hebrews 4:13; Psalm 32:8)

Now, that is living by faith!

Pushed away

You probably know how hard it is when those we love push us away…

  • If you don’t do what I say, you can’t be my friend.
  • If you love me, you will never disagree with me.
  • If you care for me, you won’t tell the truth.

What are we supposed to do? We are upset and scared.Stacheldraht

But God doesn’t push us away. He says, “I, even I, am he who comforts you. Who are you that you fear mortal men? … I have put my words in your mouth and covered you with the shadow of my hand.” (Isaiah 51:12,16)

God gives us his dignity. He gives us the wisdom how to respond. He protects us. We can move on.