‘It wasn’t your fault.’

Sometimes people tell us, ‘It wasn’t your fault,’ especially when we struggle with our past. But we might push them away, for they obviously don’t know what went on.

But often those on the outside can see our lives better. They hear our stories and the guilt we have assumed. They see how we were made to feel responsible. We feel guilty for things we never did.

It takes a journey to move from shame to freedom. It takes accepting the invitation our friends have extended. For they long to see us living OUR lives and leaving behind the lies.

‘It wasn’t your fault,’ are releasing words. We can move on.

(photo by Pixabay – www.pexels.com)

Those unexpected memories…

We may have done everything properly as we grieved:

  • Gone through the five stages of denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance*.
  • Committed our broken hearts to God and asked him to heal us.
  • Trusted him for our future, that he would help us through.

We moved on… but then something happened to remind us. A conversation. A situation. An emotion. And we grieved yet again.

I have learned to lay each flashback at Jesus’ feet, to sit with him in the night for as long as I need. I have learned to accept his precious promises as my own. “The Lord, the King of Israel, is with you; never again will you fear any harm” (Zephaniah 3:15). We don’t have to be afraid. Jesus is with us. We can get up and live.

*1969, psychiatrist, Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

Photo by Jon Asato on Unsplash